Home » I Gots Something to Say. Again. » The Belly of the Beast

The Belly of the Beast

I have waited a long, long time to post this.  Partly because I was so angry at the turn of events, angry at the person and primarily to make sure that the Girl didn’t get in trouble for me shooting off my mouth.   

Cause we all know I can.

This is a labor of love and patience.  Meaning, this shit is LONG, drawn out and LONG…grab some coffee and kiss the kids goodnight… but for me, for my girl, it’s necessary.  I have said it before, writing is supposed to be cathartic…here goes…

     The Backstory

 After a contentious breakup for both of us, we were in the final stretch.  End of January, moving in FOUR days…the Girl was going to finally get her belongings, mine were packed and we were headed back to Dallas to reclaim our family…

So it’s Thursday, after the Tuesday that the Girl spent with the Beast (as I call her ex, it fits) going through items, deciding on who gets what television and what spoon…the Girl took the day off work to go sign her home over to the Beast.  Simply because, there wasn’t any equity and she was tired of fighting the Beast over it. 

Okay, it’s Thursday, the Girl has dropped me off at work and about 25 minutes later I get a phone call.  It’s not at all what I expected….

“Baby, she did it…she cleaned the house out.  Everything is gone!”


After a few phone calls to the Beast, the police, the Beast’s “best friend” Alicia (she’s a peach!) and two of the Girls most amazing friends to come help the Girl in her most painful time. 

Basically, the Beast met with the Girl on Tuesday, agreeing, marking, negotiating all items, all property in the house.  The Girl left her on Tuesday night, with the understanding of what was staying what was going.

We found out later, that the Beast worked ALLLLLL night Tuesday night and Wednesday with “friends” and day laborers removing every stick of furniture, every plate, and every roll of toilet paper.  I mean the Beast took EVERYTHING, including pens, paper, all of it…including the Girl’s deceased mothers personal effects, just to make it hurt more.  Bitch. Personal items of the Girl’s, items she brought TO the relationship and items they purchased together…

To call her a Beast is about the nicest thing I can say.  I absolutely detest this woman.  She is the worst type of person I can think of…

It gets better.

                                                                                     The Main Event

About 11:30 am, the Girl gets a phone call.  We are still reeling from the shock of the empty house, the phone calls to the police, the realization of what Beast has done.  Then the phone call…

“Ms. the Girl, this is Judge Fineberg, can you please appear in my court today at 2:00 pm to answer an Order of Protection?”   (By the way, the Protective Order was FILED at 11:24 am THAT DAY!!!)

The Girl assures him that she can, in shock and a bit of terror.  She doesn’t understand what the hell is going on.  This is from a person she spent 10 years with, a lifetime, they owned a home, had pets, friends, they were family….and she’s a Beast.

We get to the courthouse at 1:30 PM and Beast is sitting there with a paralegal.  It takes everything I have to even LOOK at her.  My jaw is clenched and my palms ache to smack the shit out of her….but I resist.

The Girl, looks like someone took her heart out and boiled it.  She is at that moment, broken…I ache to fix it, I ache to protect her, I ache for her.

We get into the courtroom and the judge asks if there is a way this can be worked out amicably.  The Girl responds, “Yes, Your Honor, I thought it was, I am not sure why I am here.”

He then declares he is dismissing the request of the Protective Order as the Girl hasn’t had a chance to retain counsel and if they can work it out, there won’t be any need for the orders.  He’s a spectacularly nice guy…

The next part, I can actually write word for word, as it is part of an actual COURT document and is public record.  Yes, public fucking record.  Because she.is.a.beast.  I will change some of the names, but I don’t have to…

I am at this point going to put WORD FOR WORD some of the bullshit in the “affidavit.”  Some is just legalese and some isn’t worth the effort.  But the chosen blurbs, yes, these are so hysterically incorrect and sad…they deserve to be mocked.  Which I will do, IN BLUE….

(again the words IN BLUE will be my (our) truth, my side of the story the rest will be taken from the actual document that you can search if you need to….)

Note:  everything in blue can be backed up with a text message, an e-mail, a voice mail or a witness.  It’s not like I am pulling shit out of my ass…it’s fact.  As for the rest, it will read like a bad Stephen King wannabe novel…

                                           The BULLSHIT aka Petitions Supporting Affidavit

“My name is Amy M**eland.  [ok, we’ll go with this.  Although I will be requesting documented proof of this.]

“I am above the age of eighteen [way above] and am fully competent [again, need documented proof] to make this affidavit.  The facts stated are within my personal knowledge are true and correct. [yeah, in Amyworld]

“On or about October 13, 2009 at 3:00 am the Girl woke me up and demanded to know about phone calls on my phone and refused to let me go back to sleep.”  [this is true, although at this point, at 3:00 AM, the Beast wanted to know if the Girl was in love with me and when answered in the affirmative, the Beast kept the Girl up all night to “talk.”]

“Two days later on October 15, 2009, the Girl moved out of the house without prior notice.  She left in my vehicle, a white 2003 GMC Yukon.” [the Girl didn’t actually move out until October 23rd and Amy GAVE her the keys to the Yukon which the Girl had been driving for the past six months to and from work everyday, but I digress…]

“On or about October 18, 2009 the Girl returned to the house.  She demanded bills pertaining to the home and wanted me to return certain credit cards.  The credits cards were in both our names.  She also asked me for $3,500 to lease a home.  I gave her the credit cards but refused to give her the $3,500.”  [First, it wasn’t October 18th; it was after October 23rd, when she moved out…She didn’t demand anything.  On the contrary…the credit cards were in THE GIRL’S name and the Beast had racked up credit card debt in the Girl’s name to the tune of $90K+.    She didn’t GIVE her the credit cards, she had them hidden, and the Girl didn’t get these until the END OF DECEMBER.  She asked for the bills as the Girl was the sole breadwinner in the house (oh, sorry, the Beast was on unemployment…) and she needed to know what money was going out.  She was still fully carrying all bills, groceries, hair appointments, nail appointments for the Beast.  As for the $3,500 for a lease, that’s complete bullshit…I had a home in Aubrey.  We weren’t sure WHAT we were going to do and the Beast OFFERED to get a couple of jobs to help the Girl with deposits and pet deposits.  We both thought that was awkward and weird…still do.]

“She (the Girl) stated, “ok, fine, I will get it out of you one way or another.”  [if you know the Girl, this is completely OUT OF CHARACTER and not words she would ever say….]

“On that same day (October 18th), she left my White GMC Yukon in the driveway and left with another friend.”  [REMEMBER THIS STATEMENT, it will be important later…and the day she left the Yukon and left with a friend, WAS IN NOVEMBER, November 18th, to be exact and she went to HOUSTON for the weekend for the LPGA tour.  AGAIN, WILL BE IMPORTANT…]

“On October 20th she came back to the residence in Garland when I was in Oklahoma visiting my family and took the keys to my car and left in my vehicle.” [Again, not October, NOVEMBER….]

“Friday November 27, 2009, the Girl entered my home while I was present to retrieve our pets and told me I would never get my home.  She stated she would fight me tooth and nail.  I again, demanded the return of my car and she again refused.  I did not report the car stolen because she is a Dallas County Police Officer and has told me on numerous occasions that she is above the law.” [oh.my.God. ok….on Friday, November 27th, the Girl CALLED from Aubrey, said she was coming to get the pets as the Girl and Beast had agreed that all three should remain together.  Beast helped her load the pets, the supplies, the food and the large pet cage INTO THE YUKON (that she’s demanding, remember?).  It was emotional for them both and there were tears from both of them.   At NO POINT in the HISTORY of my knowing the Girl have the words “I am above the law” come out of her mouth.  I have known her 28 years.   She is one of the most respectful of the law type people I have EVER met.  It’s hysterical that the Beast put this in here with a straight face.]

“On December 8, 2009 the Girl called demanding bills and threatened to enter my home and “take everything she wanted and she would ruin me.”” [The Girl called, asking for the latest bills as she WAS STILL SUPPORTING THE BEAST. (Oh I’m sorry, she was on unemployment)]

On December 15, 2009 the Girl called me 7 times in a harassing manner with verbal threats.  When I answered the last call, she stated, “I’m here and I’m coming in.”  As she spoke, I heard the garage door opening.  She entered the home and walked to my home office.  She refused to leave and I was scared and felt threatened.”  [We were in Aubrey, she called to ask about bills, AGAIN, and left two voice mails, when she didn’t answer, we decided to go out and see (1) if she was home and (2) to get the bills.  This was at 9:30 PM, the Beast offered her something to drink and spent the next 90 MINUTES sitting with the Girl going over the bills, making a handwritten spreadsheet (which we have) and discussing the debt load and the disposition of the house.  Again.  POINT OF FACT:  The Girl’s name is still on the deed to the property at this point and she is still paying the mortgage so technically, she still OWNS the house and can come and go as she pleases.]

“She had another female named Stephanie T**** (me) a female I have felt threatened by in the past.  I told the Girl to never bring Stephanie to my home.   [Technically, I was in the driveway next door and not at THEIR house.  As for “threatening” her…funny….two months before this, she was in my bathtub. I digress…]

“The Girl says to me (the Beast) “I’m going to make you pay, I will get you.”  I felt threatened and fearful.  I asked her “Is that a threat?” her response was then “Yes, I am threatening, I will get you and I will always find you.”  I warned her to think about her job and position and asked her to leave my home.  She came in another vehicle, not my Yukon.”  [Again, words not in the Girls vocabulary in that type of sentence.  She is proud of her position and will not risk her job by doing this nor was the Beast worth it at all.  As for the vehicle she came in, it was my Explorer, that Amy offered a credit card in November to help with the down payment on…chew on that.]

“On January 5, 2010, the Girl and I met on Alpha and the Tollroad to get mail.  She again threatened to move back into the house or take it from me and make my life a living hell.”  [They did meet, at Amy’s invitation. Never getting out of either vehicle…Amy then told her that she wasn’t sure she could get financing and was looking at apartments.  She inquired if the Girl was interested in the house at that time and the Girl said no as I was opposed to living in the Beast’s house.]

“Yesterday, January 27th, I overheard a conversation between the Girl and another person.  The Girl stated she was coming back to “clean the house out.”  [Had the Beast perfected her eavesdropping skills, the Girl was talking TO ME about cleaning her CLOSET OUT.  About how much stuff she had in her closet!!!]

“I am constantly living under a threat that my home will be violated by the Girl.  I no longer feel safe in my home as she has the ability to enter whenever she pleases.”  [Puh-leese….change the damn locks and garage code, dipshit.  Not to mention the fact that at this time the Girl’s name IS STILL ON THE DAMN DEED and is STILL MAKING THE DAMN MORTGAGE PAYMENT!!!  grrr….]

“She is constantly calling me, wanting to know my whereabouts and harassing me.  I feel as though she is following me at times.” [Puh-leese, don’t flatter yourself.  She called before she came over to let you know she was coming to GET CLOTHES, MAIL, ETC.  Not to know where you’re dumpy ass was.  As for following you….doubt it…again, don’t flatter yourself.]

“Because of her position, I do not feel free to contact the police.  She has told me numerous times that nothing will happen to her and I believe this.  The Girl still has refused to return my 2003 White GMC Yukon.”  [The Girl, again, respects her position and the law.  She is not the person to say such things and it’s hysterical to even think that a sentence like that is associated with her…as for the Yukon…REMEMBER, the Girl LEFT IT AT THE HOUSE when she went to Houston, on many occasions when she went and MET with Amy, she could have requested the truck or taken the keys.  At no time did that ever, EVER happen.]

And she signs this rousing rendition of Bullshit.  She should write science fiction…

                                                                                       The Aftermath

The fallout from this day from Hell is that the Girl got EVERYTHING she wanted and they agreed to on TUESDAY before Amy decided to waste her time, our time and her money on an attorney.  The Girl got exactly what they agreed to.  Including THE YUKON which is now solely in the Girl’s name.  (Funny side, my name is on the insurance….teehee)

On February 19, 2010, they met at Amy’s attorney’s office to transfer titles to vehicles and Amy stated then that she had further found more of the Girl’s personal belongings.  It took 60 additional days to GET the items, but as of today, May 11, 2010, we have everything and are completely done with the Beast.

As a closing statement from the Beast, on the 19th she said to the Girl, “I hope when this is all done, we can still be friends….” (Wait for it….blech!)  The Girl was flabbergasted and almost fell off the curb!!!

The final meet happened in March.  In the same parking lot at Alpha and the Tollroad.  At the end of the meet and once the Girl had the only thing she truly wanted from Amy, her mother’s letter opener, (which I am looking at!)  she handed the following to Amy…

Understand, that by taking me to court, any chance of friendship is now gone.  I want nothing from you.
You have lied, you have ruined my trust in you and have tarnished any good memories I have had of the past 10 years.
Remove me from your will, as your emergency contact; remove me from your life, as I have done with you.
Don’t call me, don’t text me, leave me alone.  My friends, they too, want you to forget them.  All of them.
You had said in the past, “You know me.”  I find now, that I probably never did.
Forget me, as I will forget you.
I hope, in life, you get all that you deserve. 
I have.
I will.                                                                                                                                                            03/27/2010

 With that, we are done.  We have closed that chapter.  We have the pup population, we have the daughter, the son and our friends.  We have a life. 

Kris came through it with strength and support.  Her position and her reputation intact.  Why?  Because people see through Amy.  They see the good in Kris and that she isn’t the person that Amy tried to portray her as in the Affidavit. 


I am prouder of Kris than ever before and am amazed daily by her trust, character and integrity.  I haven’t met anyone with more.

We have moved forward and Amy is, as I am sure, dealing with the karma that she has brought upon herself.

Actually, as a personal note:
Amy, if you are reading this, remember the time in September, at my home in Aubrey, when we were grilling and cooking TOGETHER and you confided in me that you (1) wanted the Girl to move out of Garland and to Aubrey. (2) Move back to North Dallas and (3) get a pool?  Remember how I told you I would make it happen, that I would talk to her and get her out of Garland?  Remember that you told me I couldn’t do it…?  Well….she (1) moved to Aubrey.  (2) Moved back to YOUR selected area of North Dallas and (3) has a pool.

You’re welcome.

One thought on “The Belly of the Beast

  1. Stephanie,
    I could probably write a dissertation, or talk to you for hours about this (which would be enjoyable), but I will choose to be concise here… AWESOME JOB!!! I’ll never forget the first time I met the “beast.”

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