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Just say no…

In the past couple of weeks, I have had a couple of people tell me that I have changed.  It got me to thinking…

One said it out of love and concern…thank you.  I love you back.

The other said it from a place of control and hurt…you aren’t missed yet.

Both read this, they can figure out which is which. (hint:  check the comments, because a certain one will not be able to control their need for the last word.  trust me.)

Truth is….

I have changed.  Quite a bit.  Especially in the past 8 months.

Deal.with.it.

I have found that to be happy, doesn’t mean I have to take care of everyone else around me.  See, that’s a character flaw in me.  I am a fixer.  Typically that means, I will try to fix everyone and everything else around me so I don’t have to look too hard at my own issues.

Now, I look directly to me first.  I get to make my own priorities and make my own decisions.  Based on what I think I need to do.

This typically revolves around my kids, my Girl and myself.  If it’s good for us, then I will move forward.  If I find at any turn it’s not going to work in our favor, then I cut my losses.

This includes and excludes aLOT of stuff.  People, places, things, you know…the crap that doesn’t work.

In doing this, I have found who my true friends are.  I have found what is important to me.  I have found what is vital and paramount to me and mine.

Let no one think for one moment that I haven’t changed.  Instead of putting any bullshit before my kids, before me, before my Girl…I put us first. 

Well, after my faith, which isn’t exactly what I call a “priority”….I call it essential and it’s like oxygen.  I can’t do anything without my faith.  Ican’t put anything else first without it. 

I love my friends, they are truly my family. (You know WHO you are!)  And I look forward to blending the Girl’s friends which I am quickly falling for with my friends…I can’t wait to see the new directions that all these egos (to know them is to love them) take me.

I have found me. 

I love that.

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