Home » Dialogue for the Masses » Roadside Assistance Dialogue.

Roadside Assistance Dialogue.

Gotta love her.  The wife that is.  Even when I am my most frustrated, she makes me laugh.  Gotta love her.

So today, being the last 12 minutes of my day blew up in my face…I was not AT ALL surprised to walk out to my car and find my rearview mirror hanging by the electrical wires.  Not surprised.  At.All.

I call the wife, as soon as Travis removed the dangling offender…(thank you Travis!) and almost immediately her giggle was too quick, too loud and downright ruuuude! 

The conversation went a bit.like.this….

Me:  “Hey…I’m just leaving…”

The Wife:  “Everything ok?”

M:  “No, my mirror fell off.”

TW: “wha-?”

M:  “MY MIRROR!!! It was dangling by the wires!”  (The Wife states that wires at that point had THREE SYLLABLES)

TW:  {giggle} “Sorry baby…”

M:  “Are you REALLY laughing?!?!?! Cause this isn’t funny….I can’t see out the back.  It’s making me crazy.  I’m driving a hooptie SUV!”

TW:  “No, you’re no-“

M: {interrupting} “No, I am!  I am driving a hoopties with these wi-i-r-es hanging down, oh, and the mirror is in the seat NEXT TO ME!”

M:  “People are staring at me like I dropped a boob or something!”

M:  “They are staring saying, oh my, look at the welfare mom in her hooptie with no boob, heading for Wal-Mart….”

TW:  {giggle} “No baby…they shop at dollar stores…” {giggle, snort!}

M:  {crickets} “Oh, my bad.”

Yeah…so the wife stopped on the way home and got an adhesive kit for the mirror…cause Ima princess and won’t drive it until the mirror is fixed.  Not for vanity reasons…like I stare at myself in the mirror…but because I feel like an idiot every time I look up to see behind me and all I see are wires….oy-vey!

As a karmic reminder that I am not the center of the universe, as soon as I pulled into the garage, the temperature gauge shot up to HIGH and the smell of coolant invaded the interior of my car.  It was some spiffy smoke coming from under the hood.  Guess I shouldn’t have punched it around the Lexus on the Tollroad.  And giving him the bird probably didn’t help…

Guess there’s a mechanic in my future.

2 thoughts on “Roadside Assistance Dialogue.

  1. Oh, my dear princess… I drove my last car with the sideview mirror duct taped to my car for a year before Bryan finally fixed it for me. Now *THAT* is hooptie!

    • well, I called it ghetto but decided that hooptie had a nicer “ring” to it.

      Typical man…duct tape fixes everything…God help me if my boob DID fall off….I fear it would be duct taped back on!!!

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